as a child
it would have been thought
these were gods hands
---
a minor gesture while
floating with them divine
above sweaty tourists
---
so close, within reach
eons pass, great works crumble
distant as ever
---
searching for a God
One to touch, not contemplate
thus put on ceiling
---
The cracking plaster
reveals the nature of god
more than the painting
19 comments:
don't get droopy on
me now Quincie this is the
time of creation
-------------------------------
The heat Arthur
the heat, I know Maude the heat
is unbearable
anonthy
as a child
it would have been thought
these were gods hands
Anonthy, you are chronic at the rules of haiku but, a) you're cracking me up and, b) there's something really delicious about the precision of your words. Which is to say I had a half-arsed, in-my-head stab at rewriting them and all I could do was ruin them. Thus I decided that they were exactly right, ha ha.
Nice one Su, gorgeous flow.
Also I just wanted to say that I thought last week's effort was excellent, better than I expected. I probably could have left it up for another week and the haiku would doubtless have continued to flow. I think it's the nature of P2P's pix. God knows around here we like our art ambiguous. Thanks P, Thanks folks.
The cracking plaster
reveals the nature of god
more than the painting
der schutte
reaching up and up
to touch that something greater,
but touching nothing
der schutte
Yay the Schutte! I was wondering when you'd get back mate. We were only ever a click away. Anyway glad you're here and good to see you've not lost your deft hand nor your sense of the sublime.
"Hey, pull my finger."
"I am the Lord thy master,
thus you must pull mine."
in the beginning
God gave us the finger
thus setting the tone
a minor gesture while
floating with them divine
above sweaty tourists
the above was me. surfing around with different google accounts always leads to confusion.
Thanks P,
You have two identities? That would drive me nuts.
Mate, I'm going to make the tiniest change to your haiku and then it will be perfect.
a minor gesture
while floating with them divine
above sweaty tourists
Actually if I'm in teacher correction mode why don't I go whole hog? Without my copy of Fowler's Dictionary of Modern English Usage I'm unable to tell you why 'them divine' is wrong precisely. But it is wrong. Perhaps what you're looking for is 'those divine'? Otherwise, how about 'the divine'? That would work very nicely. (And getting really nitpicky now - believe it or not, it's possible to make 'above' into one syllable by using o'er, a poetical variant of 'over').
Apologies mate, there's something about speakers of English as a second language that turns me back into an English teacher again. Particularly when they're as good at English as you are, ha ha.
Oh! I meant to say - good haiku. Actually I really love how everyone here has chosen a different direction from which to approach this pic. For me, that's the point of the exercise and here we've completely nailed it. Yay!
It's good to be alive isn't it?
I got lost...
but now am found
derschutte
Adam was naked
innocent and muscular
but not well endowed
derschutte
I will defend my use of 'them,' though I really didn't have any clear idea why it sounds true to me together with divine. my dictionary has put it in a rather funny way, though might be just me who derives humor from this:
• [ singular ] referring to a person of unspecified sex : how well do you have to know someone before you call them a friend?
I find myself quite often bending the grammar in english, I guess for I'm irrationally following a sort of a song, a rhythm, which I find in it (and, interestingly enough, don't find in finnish).
I'm very happy to receive comments on my language, for I haven't been taught in four years on how to express myself in english, and the path I've been walking has been greatly affected by other non native speakers I've tend to spend my time with. well, you must know how italians bend english...
and when it comes to identities, heh. I have two google accounts I use, one for fun and other for more not so fun email stuff, both of them tied to a number of other web spaces with more material to build an identity with.
it's -26C right now, been like this for over a week, so I would recommend not to wonder why finns spend a lot of time with their personal computers, thus filling the potential space of internet with all kids of material. personally, I'm really proud of IRC as a finnish achievement.
Good on you, P! If them is what you want, then quite right. Don't listen to me - I certainly never do.
As for Finns on the net, you don't need to tell me. Whilst I've never counted, in terms of European fans of the church blog, the UK predominates sure, but then to my casual eye it appears that Finns come equal second with Germans and French with Italians coming in a soft third. Given the size of the population, along with Finland's distance from the English speaking centres, it's extraordinary really.
Mind you, the vast majority of those reading me in exotic locales are a cipher. I have no idea who they are and it's entirely possible that they're expats. Who knows? Not me.
so close, within reach
eons pass, great works crumble
distant as ever
FB
Its rude to point and
You can’t put a contraceptive
On my finger – No!
And P, your English is fine but remember that talking dirty is no excuse for bad grammar, he, he, he.
searching for a God
One to touch, not contemplate
thus put on ceiling
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